What You Need To Change to Feel Confident Horse Riding

How would it feel if you were the confident horsewoman you dream of being?  What would you need to change to become her?

One of the things that happens when you’ve lost your confidence is that you’re in a victim mindset.

Sh*t  happens to victims.

Victims get ignored.  They get stepped on. They get pushed around. They feel like they have no control over their situation. I’m sure you can relate to that when it comes to riding and handling horses.  And it feels a lot like that when you’ve lost your confidence or when you’re dealing with fear or anxiety.

Empower Yourself

When you stop seeing yourself as a victim, a fearful or anxious person, or a person without confidence, you empower yourself.  

You start to set clear and consistent boundaries. With people and with horses, what gives us some control is setting clear boundaries. With people it’s saying no. You can say no to your horse, too. Start with setting boundaries about your space.

When you kindly but firmly set clear and consistent boundaries your confidence grows. And that changes how people – and horses – see you. And how they behave with you.

Believe in Yourself

See yourself as a confident rider – a confident horsewoman. Believe in yourself.

Be honest about your strengths as well as your weaknesses. It’s so common to put yourself down and focus on the negative. There has to be something positive.  Find it.  

We all have some strengths. Focus on them. Write them down. Remind yourself daily of them.

Stop Beating Yourself Up & Get Help

Don’t beat yourself up about your weaknesses. Everyone has weaknesses. They are simply the things you need to work on. Just be aware of them and be willing to get help.

Stop beating yourself up for what you don’t or can’t do, mistakes you have made.  Take them all as lessons.  These are things you need to work on, to learn to get help with.  

Get experienced, knowledgeable help for the areas you need to improve. Your riding and horsemanship skills. Your knowledge about horses and riding. Your position in the saddle. Your ground work.

Have a training or behavioural issue with your horse?  Get help.  

Your goal is to improve your skills and increase your knowledge.

Accept Praise

Accept praise. Smile and say “thank you” when someone gives you a compliment. Just “thank you” … without adding anything else. 

Praise yourself.  Acknowledge what you do well and celebrate your improvements. That’s called growth!  

This is where keeping a journal is helpful. At some point,  you’ll be feeling like you’re made no  progress. But, if you keep a journal, you’ll  look back through it and recognize how far you’ve already come. You’ll see what you’ve really accomplished.

What you’ve overcome.  

What you’ve learned.

What you’ve been through.  

When you have a setback (and you will have them), read through your journal to help you remember all the success you’ve really had.

What Happens When You Empower Yourself

When you empower yourself, when you step out of that victim role, others start to treat you differently. Including your horse.

There may be some push back. Because you’re changing that relationship.

Stand firm.

Believe in yourself.

Take yourself seriously and others will change.  That includes your horse.  

When you’re clear, firm and consistent things change.

When you start acting less lack a victim the world has no choice but to treat you differently.

There will always be naysayers, negative Norms and Nellies. Skeptics. Haters. People who want to bring you down and who talk negatively.

People who want to bring them down.

Just send them love.  

If it’s possible to, step away from them. Stop hanging around with them. Leave them behind.

If you can’t get away from them. Send them love, and ignore them. Believe in yourself no matter what.

Find a supportive community. If you can’t find one, create your own. If you don’t have anyone near you who supports you, come join the Confident Horsemanship Community on Facebook.

(It’s a very supportive community of horsewomen on the same journey as you.  You’ll be inspired and supported.)

There Is Work To Be Done

The battle for building your confidence really does begin in your mind. Simply believing and wishing something to be true isn’t enough. You can’t just sit on your pillow and wish for your confidence to be there.

You have work to do. There will be times of struggle.There will be setbacks.

But you just keep moving forward. Keep taking steps forward.

That work really does being in your mind. Yes there is more to it than your mind.  And, that’s what I can help you with.

It’s your mindset. It’s about understanding your horse. It’s improving your ground work. It’s about improving your riding. It’s communicating with your horse more clearly and consistently.  It’s about balance and suppleness.

It’s about all of these things. But it has to start with your mind.

If you feel like you’re fighting a losing battle to be the confident rider that you dream of being, you have to go back to where it starts – your mindset.

Change Your Mind

Becoming more confident starts with simply making the decision to change your mind.

Deciding to stop being a victim and be a confident rider. To stop being fearful and be a confident horse woman.

So, no more beating yourself up. No more excuses.  Change your mind.

Step into that.  What would it feel like if you were confident?

What does it feel like when you are confident? Because you do have moments of confidence.

When you feel confident horse riding what would you have to believe in to be that person?  What would you have to do?  What would you have to change?  What would you have to believe about yourself?  What would you have to know and what skills would you have to develop to be that confident rider?

Here’s my challenge to you … think differently about yourself.

What would you need to believe about yourself to be the confident horsewoman you dream of being?  Share your answer to this question in the Confident Horsemanship Community Facebook group.

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Boost your confidence and become the confident horsewoman you dream of being with my Confidence Booster Challenge.

Want to be able to handle and ride your horse with confidence, stop feeling anxious, say YES enthusiastically to all the things you want to do, and enjoy every moment you spend with your horse?

Check out my Confidence Booster Challenge Fast Track program now.